 | joe (joh) is dead. undead. kind of a zombie. something. a boring kid who didn't do anything with his life. he has post-humus hallucinations of a creamer cow and burning marshmallows that represent deities urging him to kill, or not, maybe, whatever really. he's going to explode probably we don't really know yet. |
 | rocky (rock-ee) is a middle aged former mob thug. his hobbies include: stalking his estranged wife, ruining all of his interpersonal relationships, boxing, fishing, picking scabs. he's getting over a crippling fear of strippers and running from the law while being immortal and not knowing it. |
 | v (vee) is rocky's ex-wife who entered witness protection and it didn't do jack. she remarried to a professor, sam (sam, rhymes with ham) who apparently once worked for NASA and has a 7 year old son, jason (jay-sun). her second marriage has been plagued by rocky stalking her and terrifying her husband (who, admittedly, is a giant wuss) and frankly she's very tired of it. |
 | blake (blay-kh, rhymes with break) and az (as, "as in") are two regular cops who happen to roll on through and hang out with some of the other characters. they're lazy and mostly amuse themselves together. more on them eventually. |
 | frank (fraynk) aka paul (surname) is rocky's childhood friend who came back to their hometown from the military with mob contacts. together they rose through the ranks of thuggery until a mysterious fall out between them. |
 | gadi (gah-dee, a sound like in "car") is a homeless kid who befriended rocky at some point or another. she has poor judgement and lives in a car which rocky stole. she walked in on frank and others waiting for rocky to get home, and now knows he's the murdering kind of criminal. she has a habit of pocketing anything without a price tag. |
